Regardless of the circumstances, it’s normal to feel nervous about dating. Nearly all of us have gotten the jitters surrounding dating or romance in some capacity at least once. Whether you’re feeling reserved about going on a date or putting yourself out there and meeting new people as a whole, you aren’t alone. Maybe, the onset of the pandemic paused your dating life. Alternatively, for those who continued to date throughout the pandemic, you know that it most certainly changed the way that planning a date works. Casual coffee shop meetups turned into video chat dates, and while some were able to opt for socially distant walks in the park, meeting up wasn’t a possibility at all for many people for well over a year. So, what can you do to adjust as the world re-opens?
Navigating The Post-Pandemic Dating Scene
Here are some ways to prepare for your first post-pandemic ventures into the dating scene:
Respect the other person’s boundaries.
It’s always crucial to respect the boundaries of your date or a potential date surrounding things like sex, personal details, and other topics. Nowadays, that includes post-pandemic boundaries. Some people will be more likely to feel comfortable doing certain higher-risk activities than others. For example, some might be comfortable sitting inside a coffee shop, where others might be more comfortable with outdoor activities. Make sure to check in with the other person and see where they’re at.
Know how to break the ice.
While dating, it’s ideal to have icebreakers in mind. This is true not just for the first conversation but for the first date. Thinking about some icebreakers or general topics to bring up before your date can help ease your nerves and alleviate awkward pauses or periods of silence during the date. Depending on what you know about a person already, here are some examples of icebreakers to use:
• How’s your workplace handling things in terms of opening back up?
• What did you do during quarantine?
• Are you more of an introvert or extrovert?
• Do you like to travel? Is there anywhere you’re excited to visit in the future?
• What kind of music do you like?
Open-ended questions make the best icebreakers because they show interest and help a conversation flow naturally. Pandemic aside, this is an excellent tip for anyone who feels shy about chatting with new people!
Don’t be afraid to take it slow.
Taking it slow gives you time to get to know another person, hence why it’s such a frequently observed rule among daters even outside of pandemic times. However, the desire for closeness due to the pandemic may lead you to jump into things when you wouldn’t typically do so. The pace of every budding relationship will vary, and only you know what’s right for you. The key is to make sure to stay in touch with what you feel is right. If you start to feel like things are moving too fast, or if you’re in a place where you want to stick with making friends and acquaintances for now due to the emotional ups and downs of emerging from the pandemic, it’s okay. Plenty of people feel the same way, and letting things progress naturally is almost always the best route when it comes to relationships.
Continue to use standard dating precautions.
Again, the desire for closeness after the peak of the coronavirus pandemic may cause you to want to rush into a relationship. It may also tempt you to throw precautions that you would usually implement to the wind due to that desire for closeness. Make sure that you remain mindful of your safety. For example, if you meet someone on a dating app, you’ll want to video chat first to make sure that the other person is who they say they are, and there are certain personal details that you might not want to reveal to a new person at first regardless of how you met them, such as your home address or workplace.
Remember that we’re all going through it.
If you’re nervous about entering the dating scene or going on your first date post-pandemic, remember that everyone else you’ll come across is likely going through the same thing. It feels awkward for everyone, and actively reminding yourself of that fact can be beneficial even if you know it logically already. For many, the pandemic put things into perspective. If you haven’t thought of what really matters in life and in your interpersonal relationships, it’s time to take inventory. Take an honest look at what you want, what you’re ready for in terms of a relationship, and what your non-negotiables are in future partnerships. Treat the people you meet with kindness, and if you are struggling with post-pandemic life, whether that’s related to dating or something else, don’t be afraid to talk with a therapist or counselor.
Find A Therapist
Whether you’re facing concerns related to dating and relationships, family life, a mental health condition, or anything else that’s on your mind, a therapist or counselor can help. There are a number of ways to approach finding a therapist. You can ask your doctor for a referral, contact your insurance company to see who they cover, utilize an employee assistance program, search the web, or sign up for a reputable online therapy website with licensed providers like BetterHelp. Regardless of how you find a therapist or counselor, you deserve to get the support that you need, so don’t hesitate to reach out and get started.
